The Liar's NFL Week 8 Picks

I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears... I'm not going to disparage the Bears...
FUCK THE BEARS!!!
Dammit.

Last Week's Picks: 9/4
Season Record: 71/32

Early Sunday Games:
Dolphins (2-4) over Jets* (4-3)
I haven't gotten my first pick right since week two. This AFC East match isn't helping to break that streak. I like the Fish here for some ungodly reason.

Giants (5-2) over Eagles* (4-2)
Man, This'll be a good one. I'd like to pick the Beagles here, but can't see the Giants dropping three straight games.

Broncos (6-0) over Ravens* (3-3)
The last few years I've HATED the Broncos (since they dumped Plummer for Cutler), but this year with Orton at QB, they're definitely back up in my top 3 favorite teams. This is gonna be a barn-burner - The Ravens three losses have come against the Patriots, Bengals, and Vikings in very close games. Go Denver!

Texans (4-3) over Bills* (3-4)
Why, oh why, am I forced to pick Texans games? It just isn't fair. I'm rocking a craptacular 1&6 record in picking Texans games this year - I blame Grossman.

Bears* (3-3) over Browns (1-6)
You rotten cocksuckers best win this one.

Cowboys* (4-2) over Seahawks (2-4)
Just when I think that the Cowboys are awful, they're good - Just when I think that the Seahawks are good, they're awful. Watch everything go all 'Freaky Friday' up in this motherfucker.

Lions* (1-5) over Rams (0-7)
The real bet here is whether Matt Stafford is gonna be able to play for Detroit. I'm taking 'em at their word and picking the Lions.

Colts* (6-0) over 49ers (3-3)
My declaration of the Niners winning the NFC West isn't looking so great right now. They're the best team in that division, but the stupid Cardinals keep refusing to lose.

Late Sunday Games:
Jaguars (3-3) over Titans* (0-6)
Tennessee has reanimated Frankentard in a last-ditch effort to get a win. The villagers grab pitchforks and light torches in eager anticipation.

Chargers* (3-3) over Raiders (2-5)
While the cops were investigating Cable's coaching beat-down, I'm amazed that they didn't collar JaMarcus Russell for murder. That turd has killed any chance the Raiders had at a winning season. With a QB swap between these two teams I'd bet on Oakland in 19 out of 20 matches.

Cardinals* (4-2) over Panthers (2-4)
I'm getting screwed in betting against the Cardinals. I'm working on the theory that if I start picking them, then they'll lose consistently - Everyone wins.

Vikings (6-1) over Packers* (4-2)
Wow! Everyone seems to think that Green Bay is going to win this one. I just don't see it. As far as I can tell, the Pack is outmatched entirely. The best thing that the Packers have going for 'em in this game are these T-Shirts.

-- No Sunday night game due to World Series --

Monday Night Game:
Saints* (6-0) over Falcons (4-2)
I understand that the Saints are probably going to lose sometime this season, but all y'all that are picking them to take a dump at home to a divisional opponent this week is ignant.
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Shadrow's Week 8 Post

Having fallen on my sword last week, I will try to follow up with some picks that make sense in this insane NFL season. Let's just say that I still hold true to my little Pickers rant and that the big boys don't hold shit to Josh and I. I would have to be the least of the equation right now considering that almost everybody who was a shoe-in last week completely and utterly shit themselves in the most publicly fashion possible. So from now on my emotions nor my affinity for my beloved Bears shall get in the way of things.

Early Sunday Games:
Broncos over Ravens
Texans over Buffalo
Bears over Browns
Cowboys over Seahawks
Jets over Dolphins
Colts over 49ers
Eagles over Giants
Lions over Rams

Late Sunday Games:
Chargers over Raiders
Jaguars over Titans
Vikings over Packers
Cardinals over Panthers

Monday Night:
Saints over Falcons

The NFL Pickers?

Plain and simple... the supposed pros of picking who will win from week to week have nothing on us average Joes who passionately follow the NFL from week to week.

The pros have access to countless statistics, instant insider information regarding injuries/ internal drama/ game mechanics and probably dedicate much more time in a week than either me or the Liar would care to give. (Considering that they are paid to do it.)

They talk to the average dregs of society as if they are gods of their domain, with all the infinite professional knowledge of their all too brief careers. They bore us to death with their endless rants about whether or not this player or that owner has the passion to take their team the distance, and whether or not TO or Crabtree or Romo or whoever in the fuck it is that week will give a damn and actually make an effort for the millions they make a year. I will make it plain and simple this week... you all can judge how you want...

Lets take a look at the breakdown of the main analysts (Current 2009 season)
ESPN
Allen (55-35), Golic (58-31), Hoge(62-28), Jaws(59-25), Mortenson(64-26), Schefter (63-27), Schlereth(62-28), Wickersham (59-31)

CBS Sports (now this is a joke)
Harmon(47-43) Prisco(41-49) Judge(51-39) Urbaro(43-47) Madden(39-51) Richard(51-39)

The Computer Predictors
Accuscore(62-28) Pick 'Em(63-27)

Where is the Liar at... (62-28)??

I won't even go into my record considering that I am a quasi-poser who couldn't even afford the time to get into a fantasy league... much less get into picking the full NFL season with a friend of 20 years because of a crazy personal schedule.

I know the Liar, and I know that he has a shitload of time on his hands at times, but for fuck sakes... There are 16 different accredited NFL predictors here. The Liar is being beaten by two (Mortenson and Schefter from ESPN by only a game or two), he's tied with 3, and beating the rest. His current record lies at...

11W-2L-3Ties

I couldn't find the ESPN 2008 stats(Hmmm I wonder why.) but the CBS 2008 stats were sad.

Let's just say that the liar Won out at...

6W-0L

Just to briefly say that any douchebag can bring you the general picks from week to week. And only a douchebag of these sorts (i.e. the Liar.) Can keep you genuinely entertained from week to week. Bring on the vinegar and water... (Liar douchebag is honored by his label...)

Now predicting the spread and all those other gambling things is something i will leave to the habitual losers... and to Vegas...

Shadrow

The Liar's NFL Week 7 Picks

The Mad Road Warriors Beyond Thunderdome: That's my theme for this week. I'm only picking two (2) teams to win at home in week 7.
I'm fucking doomed.

Last Week's Picks: 9/5
Season Record: 62/28

Early Sunday Games:
49ers (3-2) over Texans* (3-3)
I want to pick the Texicans here, but in my extensive research watching of NFL Network I discovered an interesting pattern: The Texans have gone loss, win, loss, win, loss, win... so far this season, so I'm extrapolating data from the formula and picking the Niners (and hoping for a career ending injury on Douchie McCrabtree). It's SCIENCE, people!

Packers (3-2) over Browns* (1-5)
Insert anal sex joke here.

Chargers (2-3) over Chiefs* (1-5)
I would love to see (and wouldn't be surprised by) a Chiefs upset here. Kansas City is pretty bad, but the Chargers rarely pass up an opportunity to disappoint.

Colts (5-0) over Rams* (0-6)
Breaking News: In return for Rush Limbaugh getting kicked from the ownership bid for the Rams, the White House just passed an emergency executive order that is going to give the Rams 1/3 of all points scored by the Colts in this game (in addition to their paltry earnings). Indy should still get by just fine despite this "redistribution" of wealth.

Steelers* (4-2) over Vikings (6-0)
I hate it when Nate picks first. Then I'm forced to find games to shift so that we're not picking the same across the board. I wanted to pick the Steelers here, Shadrow just gave me a push.

Patriots (4-2) over Buccaneers* (0-6)
Finally! This contest should prove to serve as colonial retribution the long running scourge of Barbary pirate aggression.

Late Sunday Games:
Jets (3-3) over Raiders* (2-4)
Remember back to ye olden day of September 28th, 2009? Chicago was a shoo-in for the 2016 Olympics, Polanski had just been arrested in Switzerland, Obama was facing strong opposition on health-care reform, and the New York Jets were a sure-bet for Super Bowl XLIV. Ah, the good old days.

Bills (2-4) over Panthers* (2-3)
I originally had the Panthers winning this one, then decided to show the Williams some love following their trouncing of the aforementioned Jets last week.

Bears (3-2) over Bengals* (4-2)
Cedric Benson has stated that he wants "revenge" on the Bears for cutting him. Well, the Bears want revenge on him for being Cedric Benson. It's gonna get ugly.

Falcons (4-1) over Cowboys* (3-2)
I want to pick the Cowboys here, but have gotten flamed in betting against Atlanta over the last couple of weeks. Twice bitten - Thrice shy.

Saints (5-0) over Dolphins* (2-3)
Hey, New Orleans: TRAP GAME! The Fish are way better than they look on paper, and their strengths play to the Saints' weaknesses. Still, I think that the Saints are good enough to overcome by the end.

Sunday Night Game:
Giants* (5-1) over Cardinals (3-2)
Hey, motherfuckers! You're the Arizona Cardinals - Start losing. Yeesh, some people just don't know their place.

Monday Night Game:
Eagles (3-2) over Redskins* (2-4)
My Skins finally face a team with a win this season. Run away!
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Shadrow's week 7 picks...

Ugh... The Liar took me to the cleaners last week... hopefully I can make a comeback this week...
Most of the undefeated teams have a cakewalk this week except for the Vikings who have to visit the Steelers this week... The Rams, Cheifs, and Buccaneers have some fun games facing Indy, Chargers and Patriots respectively. (I will fall upon my own sword now.)

Here are the picks.
Early Sunday:
Colts over Rams
49ers over Texans
Chargers over Chiefs
Packers over Browns
Vikings over Steelers
Patriots over Buccaneers

Late Sunday:
Panthers over Bills
Raiders over Jets
Falcons over Cowboys
Bears over Bengals (how could my bears shit the bed so bad!)
Saints over Dolphins

Sunday Night:
Giants over Cardinals

Monday Night:
Eagles over Redskins

Byes= Ravens, Broncos, Lions, Jaguars, Seahawks, Titans

Shadrow's Week 6 picks

Yeah... Riot Fest happenned and I could give a shit what went down that week... but the Liar and I are tied neck and neck since this little thing started... If you count my predictions starting week 3. Yeah... drinking was good that week but somehow I managed to sneak up on him.

We are at the point in the season where the sissys become the true sissys and the true studs of the league come to show their true colors. (And Nate gets a beatdown like none before!) There are more undefeated and completely smacked around teams in the league than there have been since the mid 70's. We are seeing an NFL with teams that can barely field a competative team VS. the elite of the league. We are seeing several teams that are undefeated (Giants, Saints, Colts, Vikings)

Esentially, I mean that the Raiders, Buccanners , Rams, Browns, Chiefs, Titans, Lions, Redskins, and Bills cannot compete with the rest of the league whatsoever. (OK, so 3 of these teams ended up kicking some ass...) So you esentially have 1/4 of the league that is in eternal decline... predictable defeats for the rest of the season with the exception of the occasional home win for the declining team. Thus the upper 1/4 of the league remains without many defeats and the entries into the playoffs remain predictable.... so now we are off with the week 6 predictions... edits will come to make things pretty... (and Nate jams his size 13 foot into his mouth and squeals in anguish...)

Sunday Early Games:
Jaguars over Rams
Saints over Giants
Vikings over Ravens
Packers over Lions
Bengals over Texans (Count on the Texans to fuck you on a pick!)
Steelers over Browns
Redskins over Chiefs (Fuck me... I flipped a coin on this one...)
Panthers over Buccanneers

Sunday Late Games:
Seahawks over Cardinals (UGH!!! unpredictable, the both of them...)
Eagles over Oakland (Oakland are you fucking kidding me!)
Jets over Bills (Sanchez really screwed the pooch on this one... great time for the rookie jitters.)
Patriots over Titans

Sunday PM:
Bears over Falcons (Fuck the bears!!!)

Monday PM:
Denver over Chargers (OK... lucked out on this one...)

(Holy shit did I fall to the wayside this week... Nate has officially shit the bed!!!)

Green = Good
Red = Bad

The Liar's NFL Week 6 Picks

Wow, last week was ugly. Every Riot Fest weekend my picks shit the proverbial bed, but I never see it coming. Probably because I'm always legless-drunk, sleep deprived, and half-deaf from all of the fun. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Onto week six...

Last Week's Picks: 8/6
Season Record: 53/23

Early Sunday Games:
Bengals* (4-1) over Texans (2-3)
Hey, I finally picked a Texans game correctly last week! Turns out, the trick was just picking them to lose. The Bengals should win this one (at the very last second, once again).

Packers* (2-2) over Lions (1-4)
Welcome to the bottom half of the NFC North, Fellas. Man, that feels good to say.

Vikings* (5-0) over Ravens (3-2)
I'd really like to see the Ravens pull off a road win here, but Baltimore couldn't corral Cedric Benson last week. Adrian Peterson is gonna have a motherfucking field day

Saints* (4-0) over Giants (5-0)
This is the marque game of week six. Duh. It could easily go either way, but I'm sticking with the home team.

Steelers* (3-2) over Browns (1-4)
I think that Pittsburgh had more of a challenge last week against the Lions. I'm just interested to see whether Derek Anderson completes a pass before Brady Quinn defects to the Steelers sideline.

Panthers (1-3) over Buccaneers* (0-5)
Settle down, Carolina. You just barely pulled off a win against the Skins last week (not a crowning achievement). This week you've gout to buckle down and get your heads straight for this game against Tamp... Uh... Nevermind.

Chiefs (0-5) over Redskins* (2-3)
The Redskins still have not played a team with a win yet this season. Aside from the first game (against the Giants) the combined record of their following 5 opponents has been 2&22. The two wins? Both the Lions and Panthers beat the Skins, and the only two teams that DC has beaten are the Rams and Buccaneers. FUCKING PATHETIC!

Jaguars (2-3) over Rams* (0-5)
The Jags ain't great, but the Rams are baaaaaa...d.
Sorry.

Late Sunday Games:
Seahawks* (2-3) over Cardinals (2-2)
The Shawks fucking decimated the Jaguars last week. It was brutal. Speaking of which, Owen Schmitt's berserker act worked so well last week that this week he's gonna dive into a woodchipper at halftime. Tune in.

Eagles (3-1) over Raiders* (1-4)
Does Tom O still consider himself a Raiders fan? We should all pony up and send that poor son of a bitch a cookie bouquet.

Patriots* (3-2) over Titans (0-5)
Yeah, The Titans really need a win and are dead in the water if they can't pull off a miracle in Foxborough. Too bad for them, it looks like Brady is just starting to get re-settled in his role.

Jets* (3-2) over Bills (1-4)
Goddamned Jets! I can't believe you lost to the fucking Fish last week. If you weren't playing the Williams this week, I'd so bet against you for that mess.

Sunday Night Game:
Bears (3-1) over Falcons* (3-1)
No whammies, no whammies, no whammies, no whammies!
This one's a leap of faith. I really want to believe that the Bears are for real this year, but am still gun-shy from the Grossie era. I think that Chicago can pull this off, but then again, I thought that the 49ers could do the same last week.

Monday Night Game:
Broncos (5-0) over Chargers* (2-2)
Everybody and their retarded third-cousin are picking the Bolts to upset (so much so, that the open betting line has Denver at -4). San Diego really needs this win, but I just don't see Denver rolling over for their most reviled divisional opponent. If someone is offering you Denver plus 3.5 points, make that bet.
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

The Liar's NFL Week 5 Picks

The Chicago market early games for this week are Vikings at Rams & Steelers at Lions. Ugh.
Now would be a great opportunity to clue you all into my new favorite channel: NFL Red Zone Live (channel 411 on Comcast -expanded- Chicago). It's only on Sunday afternoons and flips between all of the live games going on at that time. You get to see most red-zone possessions and key plays from across the league, plus it's commercial-free. I'm really digging it - If you have it in your cable/satellite package, this Sunday would be a great time to give it a shot.

Last Week's Picks: 13/3
Season Record: 35/13

Early Sunday Games:
Bills* (1-3) over Browns (0-4)
If it weren't for a last second field goal the Browns could have walked away from last week with a tie. Even a tie would be a step in the right direction for those clowns.

Steelers (2-2) over Lions* (1-3)
Um... Yeah... Moving on.

Cowboys (2-2) over Chiefs* (0-4)
Hey, all you Dallas wags who insist that the Cowboys suck. Take a good long look at the Chiefs this week, then reconsider your parameters of "suck".

Vikings (4-0) over Rams* (0-4)
Oh boy, I would LOVE to see an upset here.

Giants* (4-0) over Raiders (1-3)
I was briefly smitten with the Raiders early this season after watching their high-octane opener against the Chargers. That period of infatuation has now officially expired.

Eagles* (2-1) over Buccaneers (0-4)
McNabb's McRibs are McBetter. Not that it really matters, Philly could win this one with any of their active QBs behind center.

Panthers* (0-3) over Redskins (2-2)
Why am I picking a winless team to pull out an upset over my beloved Skins? Because my beloved Skins are a fucking train-wreck right now.

Ravens* (3-1) over Bengals (3-1)
This one's for some of the marbles. Yeah, that doesn't have such a great ring to it, huh?

Late Sunday Games:
49ers* (3-1) over Falcons (2-1)
I'm drinkin' the Niners' Kool-Aid - I might need to spike it with a healthy dose of booze if they can't pull off this statement-win.

Jaguars (2-2) over Seahawks* (1-3)
I was tempted to pick the Shawks here, but then flashed back to those day-glo jerseys and slipped into an epileptic fit. I can't reward that.

Cardinals* (1-2) over Texans (2-2)
The Texicans remain the only team that I still haven't picked correctly this season - I see no reason to kill the streak here.

Patriots (3-1) over Broncos* (4-0)
A Denver win here would be fucking sweet, I'm just not betting on it. Interesting note: The Patriots have not played a team yet this season with a loss. So far their games have been against teams with the following records: 0-0,1-0,2-0, 3-0, and now 4-0.

Sunday Night Game:
Colts (4-0) over Titans* (0-4)
A bunch of people are picking the Titans to pull off a huge upset here. A bunch of people are total fucking retards.

Monday Night Game:
Jets (3-1) over Dolphins* (1-3)
AFC East inter-divisional games are notoriously hard to predict. In situations such as these, I just bet against the Fish.
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Shadrow's Week 5 Picks

These will be abbreviated even further this week... I will be out with the Liar @ Riot Fest all weekend. So the shit talking will commence even further.... Not to mention that we won't really give a shit what happens this weekend in the NFL 'til sometime next Wednesday.

Early Games:

Ravens*(3-1) over Bengals(3-1)

Buffalo*(1-3) over Browns(1-3)

Carolina*(0-4) over Redskins(1-3)

Steelers(2-2) over Lions*(1-3)

Cowboys(2-2) over Chiefs*(0-4)

Giants*(4-0) over Raiders(1-3)

Eagles*(3-1) over Buccaneers(0-4)

Vikings(4-0) over Rams*(0-4)

Late Games:

49ers*(3-1) over Falcons (3-1)

Texans(1-3) over Cardinals*(1-3)

Broncos*(4-0) over Patriots(3-1)

Seahawks*(1-3) over Jaguars(2-2)

Sunday PM:

Colts(4-0) over Titans(0-4)*

Monday PM:

Jets(3-1) over Dolpins(1-3)*

*=home team
Green=right pick
Red=wrong pick

Ahhhh midweek NFL... drek...

Let us see where I am with the Liar.... Since I have been posting here, he is one ahead of me... unless he wants to take on the dare,,,,

Shadrow

Shadrow's Week 4 picks

I went out on a limb last week with a bunch of picks and paid for it... 11-5 for the week... It is really late right now and I will make my picks really short and to the point. When in doubt I have gone with the home team. I will leave the silly banter to the liar this week.

Early Sunday Games:
Bears(2-1)* over Lions(1-2)
Love my Bears as always... fuck the lions...

Bengals(2-1) over Browns(0-3)*
Bengals are lookin' good... Mangini has no clue...

Texans(1-2)* over Raiders(1-2)
Texans are a mystery this year but I cannot pick the suckraiders.

Colts(3-0)* over Seahawks(1-2)
Seahawks will get eaten alive.... and pay for their dayglo last week...

Jaguars(1-2)* over Titans(0-3)
I think the Titans will not be able to overcome away from home. Having the most dissappointing start of the '09 season.

Giants(3-0) over Chiefs(0-3)*
Giants=good Chiefs=realllllly bad right now....

Ravens(3-0) over Patriots(2-1)*
Ravens have everything going for them aside from being 0-4 against the Pats... eek... hope I don't choke on this one.

Redskins(1-2)* over Buccaneers(0-3)
Suck vs. suck. I pick less suck.

Late Sunday Games:
Buffalo(1-2) over Dolphins(0-3)*
Miami has figured out every way to lose this year

Saints(3-0)* over Jets(3-0)
Hard one to pick but I give this one to the home team and to the QB with the most insane stats ever.

Cowboys(2-1) over Broncos(3-0)*
Yeah Kyle has got an O-Line but hasn't faced a real team yet this year... if non-homo Romo shows up then this one will go my way.

49ers(2-1)* over Rams(0-3)
Singletary will make sure his boys eat the Rams for Lunch, breakfast and dinner after the fluke loss that they had last week. Not to mention that the Rams now have the longest losing streak going so far...

Sunday Night
Steelers(1-2)* over Chargers(2-1)
Hard to pick... if the Steelers lose this one they are in serious trouble.

Monday Night
Vikings(3-0)* over Packers(2-1)
I hate the Brett but at home with all their weapons... they are too hard to beat.
oh and by the way fuck both of these teams!!!

The Liar's NFL Week 4 Picks

This week is gonna be ugly. I'm looking at the match-ups and there are only four games this week that I consider 'safe' bets.
If I walk away from week 4 above .500, I'll consider myself fortunate.

Last Week's Picks: 13/3
Season Record: 35/13

Early Sunday Games:
Ravens (3-0) over Patriots* (2-1)
For my money, Baltimore is the best team in the AFC right now. That's still cold-comfort in a match-up against the bi-polar Patriots.

Redskins* (1-2) over Buccaneers (0-3)
Last week DC bailed out Detroit (once again). Luckily for my god-awful Skins, the Bucs may be an even worse team than the Lions.

Titans (0-3) over Jaguars* (2-1)
I'm going to keep picking the Titans until they finally win a fucking game (not to be confused with 'THE fucking game', which is different).

Raiders (1-2) over Texans* (1-2)
Aaaaaarrrrrgggghhh! I'm trying my damnedest not to pick the Raiders here.
It's. Not. Working.
(note: I actually had Houston winning this, and switched it at the last moment.)

Bears* (2-1) over Lions (1-2)
The Lions got their big win last week, and now need to calm down before they crap their pants. Fuck, if the Lions pull off another win this week I'm wagering that they burn what's left of Detroit to the ground out of sheer excitement...
... um... "Go Lions"?

Bengals (2-1) over Browns* (0-3)
The Bengals actually look pretty damned good this year. Yeah, I can't believe I'm saying it either. If I'm from Cincy, this game looks like a huge trap.

Colts* (3-0) over Seahawks (1-2)
Man, those were some fucking ugly S'hawks jerseys last week, huh? The Seattle area JoAnne Fabrics must be having a clearance on their day-glo materials.

Giants (3-0) over Chiefs* (1-3)
If someone has a gun to your head and forces you to pick a winner this week, here's the game that might just save your life. Other than that, it's pretty much worthless.

Late Sunday Games:
Saints* (3-0) over Jets (3-0)
Here's this week's only match-up of undefeated teams. It should be a good one.

Bills (1-2) over Dolphins* (0-3)
I really should pick the Fish here, but my unrequited (and inexplicable) love of the Bills is gaying things up.

Broncos* (3-0) over Cowboys (2-1)
Hey kids, look at what Kyle Orton can do with an offensive line in front of him.

49ers* (2-1) over Rams (0-3)
The Niners are one last-minute miracle Favre pass away from being undefeated. The Rams remain defeated.

Sunday Night Game:
Steelers* (1-2) over Chargers (2-1)
The reigning Super Bowl champs just dumped two in a row to the Bears and the Bengals. Luckily for them, they've moved out of the 'B' teams and onto the 'C's.

Monday Night Game:
Vikings* (3-0) over Packers (2-1)
GB: You little slut, you, like, totally stole my boyfriend.
MN: Nu'uh. You chased him off with your rancid cheese-breath and ugly-ass snowmobile suits.
GB: You bitch! I hope a bridge falls down on top of you!
MN: You're fat.
GB: *runs away crying*
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Shadrow's Week 3 Picks (i.e. beatdown of the rookie!)

Yep it is time for my week 3 picks... Time to see who gets beaten down this week. Hopefully not me or my Bears. Week 2 saw a bunch of great action... my Bears managed to pull one out from under the superbowl champs, the Packers ended up getting packed where the sun don't shine, and the Vikings showed that they could be the dominating force in the NFC North. (Or the Lions still just suck that bad.)

Here goes my Week 3 Picks...
Early Sunday:

Lions(0-2)* over Redskins(1-1)

The Lions will not lose another one and will finally start to gel together as a unit. The Skins on the other hand will falter on the road. You look at the numbers and they say, Skins win... but I choose the other direction. Liar can laugh at me later.

Packers(1-1) over Rams(0-2)*

I really want to pick against the Pack but the Rams still are one of the worst teams in the league without an identity to speak of.

49ers(2-0) over Minnesota(2-0)*

Risky pick on my part but I think that Mr. Gore will be able to find the holes in Minnesota's stout run defense. The 49ers have shut down Peterson in the past and will force Favre to throw the long ball which will yield mistakes. Not to mention Samurai Mike has his team believing that they can beat anyone right now.

Falcons(2-0) over Patriots(1-1)*

Tony G. has helped open up Matt Ryan's options and the Patriots are beaten up a bit. Even thought the Pats are at home I think that the holes will open up in their depth and the Falcons running game will have a field day. Not to mention Tom Brady is still not firing on all cylinders.

Jets(2-0)* over Titans(0-2)

Sanchez has to be one of the most impressive rookie QBs I have seen in a long time and the Titans have choked badly since their great start last year.

Eagles(1-1)* over Chiefs(0-2)

I am not a fan of Vick but he could walk onto the field alone, with one arm tied behind his back and still outscore the Chiefs who have fallen on hard times. Not to mention Philly is at home.

Giants(2-0) over Bucs(0-2)*
G-Men=really good--- Bucs=really bad
Bucs fans must be missing Gruden right now.

Ravens(2-0)* over Browns(0-2)
Ray Lewis chose to stay with the Ravens this year and is proving to be an invaluable defensive leader as usual and Joe Flaco is proving that his first season wasn't a fluke. The Browns... well they are the Browns.

Texans(1-1)* over Jaguars(0-2)
Flip a coin... ah fuck it, I go with the home team.

Late Sunday:
Bears(1-1) over Seahawks(1-1)*
Got to go with Da' Bears on this one.

Saints(2-0) over Bills(1-1)*
Drew Brees is playing like a man possessed right now. 9TDs in 2 games... Nuf said.

Bengals(1-1)* over Steelers(1-1)
Last minute change here. After the Steelers derailing last week and the Bengals upsetting the Pack in Green Bay last week... I am riskily picking the Bengals @ home. More Liar fodder here.

Broncos(2-0) over Raiders(0-2)*
Raiders=really bad right now... Orton has mysteriously found his winning ways again.

Dolphins(0-2) over Chargers(1-1)*
After an embarrassing loss to the Colts last week the Dolphins have to beat the Chargers. I love strange offensive schemes...Go Wildcat!

Sunday Night:
Cardinals(1-1)* over Colts(2-0)
Cardinals @ home... Peyton had the light shining down on him last week... not again this week

Monday Night:
Cowboys(1-1)* over Panthers(0-2)

The Panthers are really bad right now... The Cowboys need to prove that the most expensive stadium ever built is good for something.

*=home team

red=bad picks

green=good picks

The Liar's NFL Week 3 Picks

Oh Shit, it's week three. This is the week where I always know just enough to get suckered into a bunch of losing picks. Weeks three and four are especially brutal because they are rife for upset with desperate teams matching up against teams that have a false sense of security (it started early last week with the Pats, Packers, and Steelers tanking out). This time makes for some great football, but some horrible picks.
Here we go. *crosses fingers*

Last Week's Picks: 10/6
Season Record: 22/10

Early Sunday Games:
Redskins (1-1) over Lions (0-2)*
Everyfuckingbody is picking the Lions to pull an upset here - It has turned into the upset d'jour for this week. Personally, I'd like to see it - I love the Skins, but Jason Campbell just isn't working at QB & Coach Zorn got savaged live on Redskins Radio (which is owned by the team). Not a good sign.

Packers (1-1) over Rams (0-2)*
The Rams almost beat the Skins last week and the Pack shit the bed against the Bungles... Dare we dream? Nope.

Vikings* (2-0) over 49ers (2-0)
I really want to pick the Niners here, but I know that's my heart talking, not my head.

Patriots* (1-1) over Falcons (2-0)
The Pats are one Buffalo kneel-down away from going 0&2, and they know that. The Falcons are good, but another New England loss will bring down a world of shit that the hoodie wants to avoid like the plague. I see the Patriots pulling this one out on sheer determination.

Jets* (2-0) over Titans (0-2)
The Titans had the best record in the NFL last season, now they're 0&2. They're hungry for a win right now and should win this one hands-down in a statement game. One problem: The Jets don't know that they're not supposed to win this

Eagles* (1-1) over Chiefs (0-2)
McNabb is still out with his busted McRibs, Garcia is off pricing real-estate in the greater Philly region, Kolb got corn-holed last week, and the ASPCA's least favorite ex-con is ready to take a few snaps for the first time in years. Lucky for the Beagles, they're playing Kansas Shitty. Philly could win this one with Vick's prison-husband behind center (with said center hiking the ball standing straight up --and who could blame him--).

Giants (2-0) over Buccaneers* (0-2)
If anyone is in a knock-out pool, this week is the week to use your Giants pick.

Ravens* (2-0) over Browns (0-2)
Nothing would make Cleveland happier here than a New Browns trouncing of the Old Browns, well, that and maybe not living in Cleveland... It's a close one. Either way, they're stuck.

Texans* (1-1) over Jaguars (0-2)
I've already given up trying to figure out the Texans this season. I'm just picking them because they're at home, and hoping for the best

Late Sunday Games:
Bears (1-1) over Seahawks* (1-1)

Did you Know?: 'Bear Down Chicago Bears' was written in 1941, the year after the Bears crushed the Redskins in the NFL Championship Game by the score of 73-0 (which remains the largest shutout margin in any game in the history of the NFL).

Saints (2-0) over Bills* (1-1)
I really want to pick my Williams in this one, but the Flood-City Saints have been putting up crazy-retarded numbers in the first couple of games.

Steelers (1-1) over Bengals* (1-1)
After last week's depantsing in Chicago, the Steelers are ready to beat the shit out of the next thing that walks past. Hello, Cincinnati!

Broncos (2-0) over Raiders* (1-1)
If the Raiders had ANYONE other than JaMarcus Russell in at QB, I'd pick 'em here. They don't.

Chargers* (1-1) over Dolphins (0-2)
Everything is telling me that Miami is going to win this, but then I go back to last week's game against the Colts. The Fish dominated that game with 2/3 time of possession, but then every time Manning got the ball he slung it down the field for a TD. Guess who else can do that? Yup, Phillip Rivers.

Sunday Night Game:
Colts (2-0) over Cardinals* (1-1)
Both of these teams have me perplexed this year - I can't get a good read on either of them, so I'll do what I always do in a situation like this: Bet against the Cardinals.

Monday Night Game:
Cowboys* (1-1) over Panthers (0-2)
Jerry Jones is foaming for a win in his own private Thunderdome. The 'Boys best get a win here before the owner goes all rabid-badger up on 'em.
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

New Blood... Yes...

So finally the Nate (i.e. the Shadrow) comes out of his shell and decides to post here on Killing for Sports. Yeah... dumb move on my part considering the eternal ability of the Liar to make mere mortals shit at the sight of his predictions.

About me real quick...
I am a die hard Bears fan... fuck everyone else in the NFC North. Brett Favre is a turncoat and needs to be put out of his misery like a lame horse.
I am a die hard Chicago sports fan... I side with the Cubs but where has gotten me in the last 100 years...

To cut things to the chase. I thought it would be fun to post here on all things sports... especially football but unfortunately got in on the NFL season a couple of weeks too late. So a proposition to the Liar to make things a little more fun for this season... a duel to the death (which I will probably lose).

I know that I have come in late but lets call things even for now. (if not I will work under a handicap) From week 3 through to the Superbowl I will call things in a similar fashion to that of the Liar. May the douchebag with the best record win... and trust me the both of us together amount to a couple of tanker trucks full of vinegar and water.

Bets are in order between him and I so let the smack talk begin...

Shadrow

New Blood

We have a new blogger.
No, really!

Shadrow is joining the KfS crew. Be sure to let him know what a huge mistake he's making.

The Liar's NFL Week 2 Picks

Okay I went 12 & 4 in the opening week - Not bad.
This week I'm still kinda sick (from a crazy 24-hour bug I had earlier this week) and still all pumped full of meds, let's see how getting all goofy on cough-syrup helps with my picking skillz.

Last Week's Picks: 12/4
Season Record: 12/4

Early Sunday Games:
Falcons* (1-0) over Panthers (0-1)
Delhomme is the luckiest man in the NFL - He signed a five-year, $42.5 million contract extension back in April and now is coming apart faster than a Boatswain rocket ship. That's timing, motherfuckers! Ka-Ching!

Vikings (1-0) over Lions (0-1)*
I'm not gonna even kid myself, After this week my Bears are gonna be two-in-the-hole (2-ways).
Oh, and Ed, stop snickering.

Packers* (1-0) over Bengals (0-1)
Here's the second 2-deep hole holder.
Seriously Ed, you know what I'm saying, grow up.

Titans* (0-1) over Texans (0-1)
If the power of the Sexan Rexan Texan can't get Houston a win, I don't know what can.

Raiders (0-1) over Chiefs* (0-1)
The Raiders lost to the Chargers last week, but looked good doing it.

Patriots (1-0) over Jets* (1-0)
I think that the Jets have a great shot at an upset here. I really want to make that bet, but am picking conservatively in the opening weeks.
Postgame: I got hard-screwed for being too conservative. Now I know how Scooter Libby feels.

Saints (1-0) over Eagles* (1-0)
New Orleans picked the perfect week to roll into (the not currently sunny) Philadelphia. McNabb's out, Vick is still in the pound, and Garcia hasn't even had a chance to unpack. The Saints are all set to toss Kolb's salad.

Redskins* (0-1) over Rams (0-1)
Now here's a Skins win I can pick. I'd feel a lot better about this pick if Washington hadn't dumped 2-straight to the blowful Rams... Fucking 'Skins.

Jaguars* (0-1) over Cardinals (0-1)
Forget all the hype about 'Madden Curses' and the 'Slump of the Super Bowl Losers' - We're talking about the MOTHERFUCKING NFL CARDINALS here. They have sucked consistently for eight decades (with a one-month lucky streak earlier this year). Everything is just going back to normal.

Late Sunday Games:
49ers* (1-0) over Seahawks (1-0)
Speaking of the Cardinals sucking... Here's the team that I predicted (here) would capture the NFC West this year. Go Niners!

Bills* (0-1) over Buccaneers (0-1)
Buffalo was one kneel-down away from trumping the Pats in Foxborough and stealing a win from the NFL gods. Well, that didn't happen - They fumbled the football and lost at the last second on a Brady miracle pass. This game should help ease the pain a bit.

Steelers (1-0) over Bears* (0-1)
I'm not saying that the Bears can't win this, I'm just saying that they're not going to win this.
BTW: as of 5PM on Friday the open betting line is (+1) Steelers - Man, you gotta admire the Chicago sports fans' ability to totally fuck the odds with ill-advised wagering.
Postgame: I was wrong - WOO-HOO, wrong! It was beyond impressive how Chicago got their offense to gel so quickly after last week's goat-rope. Lookin' good.

Ravens (1-0) over Chargers* (1-0)
With San Diego's battered O-Line, Phillip Rivers enters this week's QB dead-pool at #1 with a bullet.

Broncos* (1-0) over Browns (0-1)
Howza 'bout them Broncos? You can't win every game like they did last week, Just against teams from Ohio. Hey, here's another one.

Sunday Night Game:
Cowboys* (1-0) over Giants (1-0)
The Giants could barely handle the sucktacular 'Skins last week. I'm giving Dallas the edge in this one.

Monday Night Game:
Colts (1-0) over Dolphins* (0-1)
It puts the lotion in Hank Baskett...
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Breakdown

The Pittsburgh Steelers have a good quarterback, a good group of receivers, a respectable offensive line, a solid running game, and they're all familiar with each other after a few years of doing battle together.

The Chicago Bears have a good quarterback, good running back, questionable receivers, a mediocre to disheveled offensive line, and almost zero familiarity between any of them. (Not to mention a predictable coordinator.)

Defense-wise, both teams are missing their most recognized name, but both are solid defenses, so my prediction is that we see a similar game as the Bears/Packers match last week, where defense reigns and offense only gets a play or two in each series.

Truth is, I'm less worried about the Steelers than I am about the late start time. The Bears have never done well in the later slots, and 7 games are 3:00 or later this year. All that said, I'd love to see the Bears overcome, but I think they have very little actual chance in this game. :(

The Liar's NFL Week 1 Picks (2009 Edition)

Fuck, yeah, I'm doin' it again. I really enjoy making these picks every week, and if you have rep riding on it, it makes any game worth watching. I'm in for the year, bitches.
Check back here every Thursday (or Friday, or Saturday, sometimes Wednesday, and maybe even a Tuesday thrown in for sport) for my weekly picks.

2008/2009 Season Record: 168/98/1
2009/2010 Season Record: 0/0

Thursday Night Game:
Steelers* (0-0) over Titans (0-0)
I really would like to pick the Titans in an upset here, but even I know better than to bet against the reigning Super Bowl champs on their home turf.

Early Sunday Games:
Dolphins (0-0) over Falcons* (0-0)
The Fish are going to need every win they can get to make it back to the postseason this year. This is the closest thing to a "must win" game in week one.

Broncos (0-0) over Bengals* (0-0)
Finally, now that Denver dumped Shanahan and that little spoiled bitch of a QB, I can go back to liking them.

Vikings (0-0) over Browns* (0-0)
I would love to see a Browns win here, but the Vikes are looking sharp now that they grave-robbed up a QB that doesn't completely suck.

Colts* (0-0) over Jaguars (0-0)
I want to pick the Jags here, but am playing it safe and sticking with the home team.

Saints* (0-0) over Lions (0-0)
Savor this time, Detroit. You have the best record of your season right now. Good times.

Cowboys (0-0) over Buccaneers* (0-0)
The Cowboys look like a Celestial fire-drill run amok. Fortunately for them, The Bucs are in even greater disarray right now.

Eagles (0-0) over Panthers* (0-0)
ZOMG, it's a wild-cat offense. Rawr!

Ravens* (0-0) over Chiefs (0-0)
Not all 0&0 teams are created equal.

Texans* (0-0) over Jets (0-0)
This one should be a barn-burner, and the only reason I'm picking the Texans is because of their superlative back-up QB, Sexy Rexy (now a Sexen Rexan Texan) Grossman. Bwwwaaaahhh!
Actually, I'm just going with the home team, but that Grossie bit was good for a laugh.

Late Sunday Games:
Giants* (0-0) over Redskins (0-0)
Last season I picked the Redskins to beat the Giants back in week one. Man, sometimes I am such a fucking retard.

Cardinals* (0-0) over 49ers (0-0)
And we're sure that the Arizona Cardinals are the NFC Super Bowl team from last season?
Just checking.
Postgame: I originally had picked San Fran in this one...
Original: "And we're sure that the Arizona Cardinals are the NFC Super Bowl team from last season?
Fuck it, I'm still going with the Niners."
Wish I had stuck with being cute.

Seahawks* (0-0) over Rams (0-0)
Um... Yeah... We're gonna need to go ahead and move this football game downstairs into storage room B. We have some new people coming in, and we need all the space we can get. So if you could just go ahead and pack up your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific, Okay?

Sunday Night Game:
Bears (0-0) over Packers* (0-0)
All of you regular readers of this series know that I fucking HATE Jay Cutler, but I really do think that he makes the Bears a much better team, and am ready to get behind him 100%. Whether or not I punch him in the base of the skull while I'm back there is yet to be determined.
I'm calling 10 or 11 Bears wins this year, which should take Jay up to .500 on his career W/L %.
Postgame: I'm just glad that we finally found a franchise QB that doesn't turn over the ball in critical situations.

Early Monday Night Game:
Patriots* (0-0) over Bills (0-0)
I love me some Buffalo Williams (for some unknown reason), but am not even going to think about making that bet.

Late Monday Night Game:
Chargers (0-0) over Raiders* (0-0)
C'mon, who the fuck hasn't wanted to choke-out Tila Tequilla? Anyone?
Shawne Merriman should take this opportunity and get some solid advice on the art of choking from the Raiders, they are the masters after all.
---

Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

Sexy Rexy Highlights

This is for the Liar - I know you've been missing him: http://www.nfl.com/videos/houston-texans/09000d5d81264567/Pre-WK-4-Rex-Grossman-highlights

Hitler Loves Favre

Coupla things...

So, the Dodgers walked Kosuke to load the bags (and here's the sad part) in order to bring Soriano to the plate. And Soriano (here's the sadder part) struck out. How much do we pay that asshole? Ironically, the Cubs did the same thing to the dodgers and (here's the saddest part) they got a grand slam.

Why has so much of the sports reporting in Chicago been about who called who a "doo-doo head," or whatever. Are we in Junior High?

Lou has lost the leash on the Cubs. Barring a miracle finish, we need to start a new cycle of false hope. I vote we hire Erin Andrews to manage the Cubs. At least the post-loss news conferences will be worth watching.

Rex Grossman has become the NFL's Mark Prior.

Finally, fuck baseball. It's a stupid sport.

New Logo

Welcome Back Josh Hamilton!

Harnish

NIU's sophmore starting quarterback, Chandler Harnish, and the senior leaders of the defense and offensive line, at the urging of coach Kill (best name for a football coach ever), have spent the summer drilling at least twice a week on their own. They're heading into a meat grinder on the road at Madison in their first game this season. I think that will either harden them or destroy them.

Please, wish them luck. And if anyone has any interest in coming out for a tailgaiting adventure this season, check out the scedule and let me know.

Beaten Dog

If you think about the rise and fall of Rex Grossman, it is a pretty sad story. This video cracks me up, regardless. Skip to close to the end for the Grossman stuff:


I've never seen someone so begrudging about a job, but who could blame him after squandering all that potential to a couple freak injuries early on, then getting back in time for his veteran o-line to suck and his go-to running back to leave in favor of the worst RB I've seen on the Bears. I've never claimed he was perfect, but I do think he has the worst luck.

Fuck the Cubs (If They Ever Stop Fucking Themselves)

I haven't been following the Cubs at all this season. I lost interest long before the season even began.
Anyone unfortunate to breach the subject of the Cubs in my presence since early January has heard my angry expletive-laden rant on how trading DeRosa (my favorite MLB player) and signing Bradly (my least-favorite MLB player) was tantamount to ripping out the heart of the franchise and replacing it with a cancerous turd.
Fucking Cubs.
Well, now DeRosa is on the division-rivals Cardinals roster, and Bradly looks more likely to end up in Statesville than Cooperstown. So, I'd like to take this opportunity to say: "I told you so. I hope that DeRosa fucking decimates the northsiders in the remaining inter-divisional games, and leads the Red Birds to an 11th World Series victory."

As for the Cubs? Fuck 'em.
The only thing they have going for them right now is that they're not the White Sox, and that's cold comfort even in the heat of summer.

What, Who, What?

I almost didn't recognize that Steve Goodman song. It's been a long time since I've heard it.

Sosa finally liked to roids but.... that's not why I'm pissed.

I really could care less about 2003 and proof of steroid use... My question are why aren't they prosecuting the people releasing this information? Why isn't this lawyer getting disbarred? How can these news sources release unconfirmed information? Why is the information only being released one name at a time with unnamed sources? Here's what I think....

I think the only reason they don't release the whole list is it's ILLEGAL! I don't condone the steroid use of these players but they are having crimes committed against them. First it's illegal to take medical information and give it to some one else with out the consent of the person whom the medical information is about. I am also pretty sure most states have laws against publishing said information. Don't give me the excuse that writers and the media aren't aware of the laws about publishing illegal medical records. Ignorance is no excuse for breaking the law. If we break the law to violate athletes rights to make a buck, what makes that ok? Is it because they pissed you off about tarnishing something you love? I think not these grease balls found a way to get a cut of the cash. How much different is that from your common mobster selling cigs that fell of a truck? Don't talk about responsible journalism because it does not look like sources were checked, backed or confirmed. This is a money grab nothing less. That's the real the only reason this is coming out one name at a time. Is it's illegal and some one waits until they need more money to break the law again. Unless you get consent from every person on the list to release there medical records or you bust the criminal enterprise making money off of this(Lawyer leaking information and SI releasing it.). You will only get one at a time so the crooks can milk it for every penny. The whole thing is dirty from the steroid use, cover up by management to the way it's reported.

I have to go shower.

Bad day for Chicago hockey and sports drinks.

I'm feeling bad for the Hawks and the Gatorade cooler in the Cubs' dugout. Maybe we should sick Big Z on those Red Wings.

Jake's List

Why am I not surprised that, according to Barry Axlerod in an interview today, there are "no American League teams" on Jake Peavy's list of teams he'd like to be traded to...

No American League teams

Is he used to NL lineups? Players switch leagues all the time.

Whoever gets him will be very happy for about 6 innings.

Canseco dime out update...

So far Canseco is fricking 19 for 20 with droppin man hole covers on people in baseball and roids.

Fucking Manny is a dope... wait Manny shoots dope.... no wait Manny takes female fertility drugs??? huh. Is he haveing trouble getting pregnant.

Next up is Pujois and his big ass head.

Bring On Favre

Brett Favre is meeting with the Vikings, apparently. I think he wanted to go there last year, but circumstances wouldn't allow it. Every year, the Vikings look pretty good on paper, and every year, they flame out before the end of the season.

In the NFL North, I would love to see Jay Cutler and Aaron Rodgers pound on Favre this year. I think he should have retired from Green Bay. He had a great finale season with them and his press conferences then would have seen him off with style. The mess that followed during that off-season has already chipped at his legend a little, and a run in MN might do some real damage. Or he could get hurt. Either way, it's not the most classy move to get back into the division where his legend was made. Regardless of what I think about the Packers, I give the fans credit for being tenacious. He's taking a leak on them if he goes to MN.

There's a recent interview with Jim McMahon from a week or two ago that made me laugh: (http://www.670thescore.com/episode_download.php?contentType=36&contentId=3663288)

April Baseball Review

What a pretty cool month of baseball this past month.
Here is a short review by team for the first month:

Blue Jays - Hitting everything in sight and getting very good pitching. Nice to see, but the offense will not last

Boston - Winning despite Ortiz not hitting anything. They will be in the playoffs

NY Yanks - It's about time they look old! And that pitching - They are lucky to be over .500

TB Rays - Proving that last season was a major fluke

Baltimore - I like Adam Jones and that is about it until they call up their soon to be star catcher

Royals! - Go Grienke! I have been high on this kid since 2005. What a fun team to watch and root for...Playoffs!?

Socks - Sticking around as always - They need to get one starter to help solidify the back end of that rotation

Twins - They will hang around all season now that they are getting healthy

Tigers - Inge! He just looks like a ballplayer - The rest of the team is way overrated...Although Verlander is looking good again

Indians - Cliff Lee is starting to look like himself from last season and Sizemore needs to step up if they want to contend

Mariners - Hernandez and Ichiro are awesome. The other players are just having good luck - sometimes that is all that it takes to win

Rangers - Hamilton is unhealthy and that is not god news for the Rangers. Pitching is awful for the 38th straight year

Athletics - Pretty good young starters. Staff gets much better when Justin Duchsherer (Sp?) returns. I like Giambi and was hoping he was going to get signed by the Cubs

Angels - Yeah, they look bad now and they lost some key players to free agency and injuries - Somehow Scioscia finds a way to win year after year

Marlins - They are young and will be up and down all season - probably the streakiest team in baseball this year. Look out for Chad Volstad - He has great stuff and poise

Phillies - Imagine what they could be year after year with any starting pitching. Batters 1-6 are so fun to watch

Braves - Gone are the glory days, but Cox knows how to play winning baseball. They will stick around

Mets - Santana is hot! Beltran is Hot! Too bad this team has never all gotten hot togther (whatever that means)

National's - Why are they a franchise? Should have folded when they were the Expos - You know your team is really bad when Adam Dunn is leading them in BA

Cardinals - Pujols and LaRussa are always a potent combination. They just play winning baseball year after year and Carpenter comes back in a couple weeks - Ouch! They just need to learn how to catch the ball

Reds - The whole starting pitching staff will have their arms fall off by July - That is the Dusty Baker way. Votto & Bruce will be very good ballplayers for some years to come.

Brewers - No starting pitching and spotty hitting....They will be 10 games under when it is all said and done

Cubs - F Them! Bradley? I have never liked this guy. Again, Lee should have been traded and Giambi should be playing first and DeRosa should still be the super sub...Pitching will be very strong. They will be in the playoffs.

Pirates - Should have folded with the Expos - What an awful franchise. It's a shame as they have a great ballpark.

Astros - I really do not mind seeing Texas baseball teams sucking - Where are your elbow pads now?

Dodgers - I hate Manny with a passion - He is a reincarnation of Dick Allen. Great pitching and some young talented players in the field - Just get rid of Manny

Giants - Lincecum and Cain and pray for rain!

Padres - Gonzalez and Peavy are very good ballplayers and that is all the team has. Tough hitters park they play in.

D-Backs - They are really not a good team. Haren will win the Cy Young award this year though. They desperately need Webb back and so does one of my fantasy teams! Get healthy quick!

Rockies - They changed their lineup in the past decade - They need more power. Pitching is always suspect for this team.

As Heard on Radio

Mike Mulligan this morning (paraphrased):

This swine flu is spreading almost as fast as Jay Cutler Fever!

Ozzie Guillen Cracks Me Up

From ESPN.com, Jim Caple: 10 Burning Questions For Ozzie Guillen - in regards to Obama throwing out the first pitch in 2005:

He threw out the first pitch at the 2005 World Series. What do you remember about it?

I was criticizing Jerry Reinsdorf about it because at the World Series -- and I always watch them -- there are always celebrities throwing out the first pitch. Movie actors and actresses and people like that. And then I see this Obama guy throw out the first pitch, and I said, "Who's that guy?"

and more politics:

How is his arm?

He's a great president.

Cubs News

Well, the Cubs lost in extras today and the Astros acted like it was the World Series (sorry, you jerks lost the last one you were in), but Soriano is on pace to hit 162 homers this year.

Let's Get This Football Season Started

Chicago has a franchise QB and a veteran, pro-bowl offensive tackle today. Wow. I mean, wow.

Norm Lets the Bulls Have It But Good

Storm

My favorite memories of Stormin’ Norman Van Lier are on the local ESPN station…Carmen DeFalco was doing a post game (more like a post mortem) following a listless outing. Norm was po'd about the lack of effort on the court and Carmen referenced the ironic slogan for the season…

“You know Norm, ’Everything can change in the blink of an eye’”…to which Norm responded, “Yeah everything can change with a punch in the eye too!”

As mad as I was about the crappy basketball I just watched, Norm made me laugh and fired me up with his passion for the sport he loved.

It was right around that time that Norm had his own radio show on Sunday nights and as the music played him out to commercial he demanded that the song be turned up as he sang along, “Jeremiah was a Bullfrog…was a good friend of mine”

With his passing I think of that dog food song from Three Dog Night and find it ennobled because Norm sang it like there was something good in it for all of us.

His passion and his joy always seemed genuine and in this world that is a rare thing. Heaven better look out because Stormin Norm is there…and he’s got all his fouls to give.

The Liar's Super Bowl XXLIII Pick

This had been one fucking wacky season. The Bears and 'Skins shit the bed in a spectacular fashion. A team that shouldn't have broken even is in the fucking Super Bowl. Tom Brady gets knocked out for the season, but the Pats still win 11, yet miss the playoffs. The Lions have the first perfect-loss 16 game season in NFL History. Giants fall and joke-teams reign supreme. This was a deeply strange season - Thank Christ it's over.

Last Week's Picks: 1/1
Season Record: 168/97/1

Super Bowl (6:30 PM Eastern):
Cardinals (12-7) over Steelers (14-4)
Fuck it, I give up!
I've discounted the Cardinals entirely, but they just won't die. If you can't beat 'em...
I'm picking Arizona and rooting Pittsburgh.

What's In a Name?

First, there was McPhail. Now Ricketts. Will the Cubs ever win the battle of negative names? Maybe Milton Bradley is a start.

Fucked, Jurko & Harry

...or Two Co-Hosts and a Microphone

Should a guy be paid $600,000 a year to talk about sports, booze and flatulence on the public airwaves? Probably not, but I am gonna miss Dangerous Dan McNeil host…pardon me, former host of ESPN 1000’s Afternoon Saloon.

Did I always agree with his views on the games people play?

No.

Do I think his opinions outside the realms of sports, esp. music and movies were worth a damn?

Hell no.

Do I think he sometimes went way the fuck out of his way to agitate guests, his co-hosts and the Chicago sports radio listening audience?

Yes…and I’m not ashamed to admit that is what I liked best about him.

I hate seeing these Danny Mac pieces that also mention Mike North. Yeah yeah yeah, North had a big morning drive sports show for years, but he always struck me as someone acting like he was from Chicago. McNeil proudly admits he calls the dumbest state in the Union home. He doesn't have to pretend to be from anywhere, he just needs to talk his shit and guys like me will listen.

Mac's love of hockey, even in the darkest years for the Blackhawk organ-aye-zation ranged from punk rock to downright poetic. Until this year, if someone on the show talked too much about the Hawks or hockey in general the Hawk horn blew. This is my first year of following hockey somewhat regularly and I have Mac and Harry and their love (and sadness for the long decline) of the sport to thank for that. There must be something to the icy puck and shur-wood (sp. Jeanz? Nikolai Khabibulin? anybody?!) if these guys are so ready to lament the near death of the sport.

Some douchebag once said that most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Dangerous Danny Mac had a mic and he damned well knew how to use it. Unnecessary hullabaloos may not be the hallmark of great broadcasting, but they sure made for entertaining listening during sleepy, cold winter afternoons.

The show goes on with Carmen DeFalco in the driver’s seat. I will listen because where the hell am I going in my life? But I’ll miss the loudmouth bastard that ran the show for 9 years…

…and I hope to shit I don’t run into him at a bar. It could get ugly, cuz I'm an obnoxious piece of crap even without the microphone.

The Liar's NFL Conference Championship Playoff Picks

Man, this had been a hectic playoff season (and I'm not talking about on the field). Last week I missed all but one game doing the Chili Solstice and related hinterland activities, and tomorrow night I'm gonna miss the marque game to see the Hudson Falcons at Bottom Lounge. I'm Tivoing that one, so any texts and/or calls regarding that game will be summarily ignored until after I get a chance to watch it. I'm just saying, is all...

Last Week's Picks: 3/1
Season Record: 167/96/1

Sunday Afternoon Game (3 PM Eastern):
Eagles (11-6-1) over Cardinals (11-7)
Ho-lee-shit! The Cards could be heading to the mother-fucking Super Bowl with one more win. Did anyone see this one coming? Anyway, I think that the Eagles are the far-superior team in this match-up, but then again, I said the same thing about the Falcons and Panthers.

Sunday Night Game (6:30 PM Eastern):
Steelers (13-4) over Ravens (13-5)
Yeah, I picked the Ravens to win the whole shebang, but I also said that I was hoping like hell for a Steelers -vs- Eagles Super Bowl . I'm going with hope in this one.
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Wrong picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN

Pittsburgh All The Way

Eagles, Cardinals, and Ravens. I'd bet the Rooney family is glad they don't run the Pittsburgh Parrots.

Risk, Monopoly or The Game of Life

Milton Bradley, love him and hate him, is now the Cubbies right fielder. I, for one, remember watching when he went after his manager, Eric Wedge, as an Indian and grabbed him by the throat in 2005. I said, "Indians, you do not need this crap...bleeping get rid of him, Scalp the bastard"!
...It so happens shortly after that incident I was attending one of my baseball drafts. I was outside smoking and near the end of the draft of this N.L.(Only) 13angry men draft. When one angry member in the league starts asking how much $ does each of have to spend? It came down to that I had more money ($13) to bid than any other team owner for Bradley. Little did I know that this person was reading the ticker tape on espn as I was not aware that Milton had been traded. Anyway, I would not have ventured his way at all. I had the feeling he was going high when the bidding suddenly begun for him. I put up $0 for him. I believe that the player I draft must be clean, noble, and know how to play the game. The latter praise is all I have for Bradley. I instead opted for that year to draft Ricky Nolasco, Josh Johnson and Chris Young for the $13.

I have never enjoyed having the Clemen's, Sosa's, Palmiero's on any of my teams. Ever! Never Will! This league is special as we are allowed to draft anybody not in the major leagues as future keepers. Often times my wife finds me reading many a Baseball America and checking on the potential young stars. NOT THAT YOU SICK BASTARDS! I find that I pick those who will have to claw and fight their way to the SHOW!

Enough about fantasy ball; even though it is real. Milton Bradley poses upsides/downsides for the Cubbies. He is older (30) and has claimed to have matured with the game. Is he soft? Injuries may answer that. The Cubs have an out clause in the first year that protect them from his ability to get injured. Can he contribute? Hell Ya! In that lineup and in that field! He is the same hitter from both sides of the plate - rare for a switch hitter. "He takes too many walks", I hear. Let him! He has hitters behind him! The cubs are in a rare position in the National League where their patience and power equals that of any AL powerhouse that enjoys the luxury of the DH. And their pitching is the envy of all of baseball (outside the Angels).
Will he respond to Lou? Will they have it out? How will he interact with Aramis, Lee and Soriano? The guy could not be better fitted for this team as is the team for him.
Bradley will be rested often...125 games started is my goal for him with pinch hitting duties - this helps replace Ward.
"Santi", you scream, "You Idiot"! While this is true 98.723% of the time (Calling me an idiot is a game of percentages on beers consumed), I defer that we still have Reed and Fukudome. "Santi, are you even dumber than you type?" No, I reply. The ploy is that cubbies are signing another Japanese hero to keep the other Jap happy. This means we still enjoy great defense in right field with fuku... and maybe a ressurgence of his offense. (And YES am I stupid for believing that after watching him against ML pitching)

At the end of the dealings I think they cubbies came out winners - this is only possible with a healthy Bradley (Miles and Gregg need to perform as well). There is still talk between the Padres and Cubs on Peavy who might make an interesting mid-season deal. The end goal is winning it all.
And that said, I like the off season Cubs moves. They have made themselves more liquid for the new ownership (whomever that might be - I am glad it is not crazy guy from Dallas) to make some immediate moves. (Don't forget the MLB blocking of Carl Crawford coming to us in 2006 for fear of the ownership would not be liquid enough). The Nuclueus is still there. I would love to have seen Lee gone and Giambi playing first for a season or two. Anyway, Roberts is still on the table!

The Liar's NFL Divisional Playoffs Pick

I don't know how much football I'm gonna catch this weekend. I'm planning on making the pilgrimage out to DeKalb for the Chili Solstice tomorrow night, which means that by the time I sober-up, it'll be Tuesday. Good times.
Maybe I'll catch some games with the D-Town drinking brigade, or I might just have to read about the results in the paper after they let me out of the drunk-tank. We'll see.

Last Week's Picks: 2/2
Season Record: 164/95/1

Saturday Afternoon Game (4:30 PM Eastern):
Ravens (12-5) over Titans (13-3)
I picked the Ravens to win it all this year, so (by extension of logic) they sorta have to win this game for my Super Bowl pick to happen. The Titans are tough, but I think that Baltimore stacks up nicely against 'em. This game is going to be decided by the better offense (neither of them are great, but...), I'm going with the Ravens.

Saturday Night Game (8:15 PM Eastern):
Panthers (12-4 ) over Cardinals (10-7)
How the fuck did Arizona make it out of wild-card weekend?!?! Hell, how did they make it into the playoffs to begin with? If Carolina doesn't send the Red-Birds back to the desert dejected, I'll be shocked. Again.

Early Sunday Game (1 PM Eastern):
Eagles (10-6-1) over Giants (12-4)
I'm holding a huge grudge against the G-Men for letting the Vikes have a win in their last game of the season. Fucking bums. Not that it would have made any kind of a difference if Minnesota had won, but I'm pissed on principal alone. I think that the Giants have the upper-hand in this one, but are in for a brutal street-fight against their against-all-odds divisional rival.

Late Sunday Game (4:30 PM Eastern):
Steelers (12-4) over Chargers (9-8)
The Bolts ruined what was to be Tony Dungy's swan-song season (now he'll probably come back again to make yet another run at it). Unfortunately for the Bolts, Pittsburgh is a totally different kind of team. San Diego matches up well against the high-octane show teams, but not so well against the hard-D brick-wall teams. I see the Steelers making an example of the Chargers in this one.
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Wrong picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN