The Liar's NFL Divisional Playoffs Pick

I'm sick and feel exactly like a re-fried bag of dog turds, so I'm going to make this brief.  This is looking to be an amazing weekend of football.  Two of these games look to be toss-ups, and the other two w/ strong favorites still could go either way.  So ass the couch, grab some Michael Vick's Vapo-Rub, pour yourself a NyQuillada, and get your tissues ready - It's gonna be just like the 1999 Scripps National Spelling Bee all over again.
*cough*

Last Week's Picks: 2/2
Season Record: 155/105

Saturday Afternoon Game:

Steelers*(12-4) over Ravens (13-4)

STEELERS SMASH... RAVENS SMASH... (Repeat for 3-4 hours).  It's a-gonna be a Hulk-off, bitches!

Saturday Night Game:

Falcons* (13-3) over Packers (11-6)

I'm not betting against the Falcons at home, but I'm holding out hope that the NFC championship game will be Packers -vs- Bears at Soldier Field.  Go Pack!  Great, now I feel dirty.

Early Sunday Game:

Bears* (11-5) over Seahawks (8-9)

If the Seahawks win this one, they can bring their season/postseason record up to .500 - That's some crazy shit right there.  Wanna know something else that is crazy?  This is Jay Cutler's FIRST playoff appearance.  Seriously.  The Bears should dominate here, but if they pull off an uber-FAIL on home turf, I might get my preseason wish for a new coach & general manager.  It's a win-win.

Late Sunday Game:

Patriots* (14-4) over Jets (12-5)

I'm sure that the Pats aren't losing any sleep over this one, but divisional match-ups have a way of going sideways.  There is no team out there that knows the Patriots as well as the Jets, and if they can game it just right on defense, they have a legitimate shot here.  That being said; everything has to go right for the Jets to win, and everything has to go wrong for the Pats to lose.
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Wrong Picks in pantone #cc0000
Correct Picks in pantone #38761d
*Indicates Home Team