Thursday, December 17, 2009

The Liar's NFL Week 15 Picks

I'm not going to get to watch most of the games this week. Thursday I'm heading out to Quenchers for a show, Saturday I'm going to try and make it out to DeKalb, and Sunday the family is doing an early Christmas. I should be able to catch the Skins -vs- Giants game on Monday... Fuck it - I'll take it.

Woo-Hoo, holidays!

Last Week's Picks: 11/5
Season Record: 138/70

Thursday Night Game:
Colts (13-0) over Jaguars* (7-6)

Around this time every year the Colts have homefield locked down. They put in their 3rd stringers so that their star players can get slow, lazy, and lose to the Chargers in the first round of the playoffs. I'm hoping that they've learned that lesson and play through like men.

Saturday Night Game:
Saints* (13-0) over Cowboys (8-5)
There's only one thing that could get me to miss what looks to be the game of the week: OLD DOG'S MOTHERFUCKING BIRTHDAY!!! I'm gonna try like hell to get out to D-Town and beer it up with everyone's favorite aged canid.

Early Sunday Games:
Patriots (8-5) over Bills* (5-8)
The Patriots really need to get their first (domestic) road win here. I'd feel better about this pick if this was one of the Bills' Canadian outings, as the Pats are undefeated in foreign lands so far this season.

Cardinals (8-5) over Lions* (2-11)
I can't tell you how happy a Lions win here would make me. C'mon Detroit, try not to fail at one thing for once.

Titans* (6-7) over Dolphins (7-6)
Miami has a lot more to play for in this one, but a loss (effectively) ends the Titans season. I say that Tennessee has just enough fight left in 'em to pull this off.

Chiefs* (3-10) over Browns (2-11)
The Browns got in their statement win last week (against the Steelers), the Chiefs got their statement win back in week 11 (against the Steelers) - Fucking Steelers.

Texans (6-7) over Rams* (1-12)
Hey, look! It's a game that I feel safe in picking the Texans. Finally.

Jets* (7-6) over Falcons (6-7)
The Falcons are still filthy with injuries, and the Jets proved that they could win big last week without their star QB (who should be back for this one). Then again, the decimated Falcons almost upended the undefeated Saints last week, so...

Eagles* (9-4) over 49ers (6-7)
San Francisco is looking like a championship team now that I turned my back on them (for the umpteenth time this season). On the other side, the Beagles are en fuego right now. This has all the makings of a classic slug-match, but I have a feeling that it's going to be a huge let down.

Ravens* (7-6) over Bears (5-8)
The Bears are out for the season - At this point all they can do is lay down and try and secure a high draft pick for the Broncos.

Late Sunday Games:
Broncos (8-5) over Raiders* (4-9)
The Raiders are starting Charlie Frye at quarterback this week. It's official: The QB that wasn't good enough for the Cleveland Browns is still better than JaMarcus Russell.

Bengals (9-4) over Chargers* (10-3)
24 hours ago I would have picked the Chargers here. Chris Henry's death changes all that. I say the Bengals win on emotion (as did the Skins late in 2007 after the death of Sean Taylor).

Steelers* (6-7) over Packers (9-4)
I couldn't be more over the Steelers right now, but I'm hoping that someone (anyone) lays down the hurt on the Pack before the playoffs.

Seahawks* (5-8) over Buccaneers (1-12)
I'm kinda in a rush here to get out to the bar. I'm not gonna waste any more time trying to think of anything insightful to say about this turd-bowl.

Sunday Night Game:
Vikings (11-2) over Panthers* (5-8)

I sure am glad that Green Bay shipped Favre off to New York so that the Bears wouldn't have to worry about that clown dominating the NFC North.
Wait... what?!?!

Monday Night Game:
Giants (7-6) over Redskins* (4-9)

I'm seriously tempted to pick the Skins here, but I think that they're saving up all of their upsettin' for the final game against the Cowboys.
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Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team

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