Well, this week is already off to inauspicious start (fucking Steelers). Here's hoping (against hope) that the Thursday game isn't a portent of things to come.
Last Week's Picks: 9/7
Season Record: 127/65
Thursday Night Game:
Steelers (6-6) over Browns* (1-11)
I'm going miss this one. Why, you ask? Because I'm gonna be rocking out to Cheap Trick at the Allstate Arena. In your face, sports.
Postgame: By the looks of it, the Steelers would have had a much better night if they (collectively) had snuck out to a concert.
Early Sunday Games:
Saints* (12-0) over Falcons (6-6)
New Orleans has "Who Dat", Cincinnati has "Who Dey". The Norwad & I decided that we're going to popularize "To Whom Does That Concern" as the new Bears slogan. I think it's damned catchy.
Packers (8-4) over Bears* (5-7)
Okay, I think that the Bears are probably gonna win this as a last-gasp grasp at mediocrity, but I've gotten hard-screwed this season in picking the Bears and picking against the Pack. I'm going with the brain over the heart.
Postgame: After that goat-rope, does anyone doubt that the problem with the Bears lies with the coaching staff?
Colts* (12-0) over Broncos (8-4)
I'd like to see a Denver win here, but you never pick against the Juggernaut, bitch.
Bills (4-8) over Chiefs* (3-9)
The Bills have been decent since they gave the Dick of Jauron his walking papers. Decent is all you need to beat the Chiefs.
Vikings* (10-2) over Bengals (9-3)
I could make a solid argument for Cincy in this one, but (at this point) the Vikes have more to play for.
Patriots* (7-5) over Panthers (5-7)
The Patriots don't lose in New England (or old England). They lose everywhere else.
Jets (6-6) over Buccaneers* (1-11)
Mark "Dirty" Sanchez is grounded for pulling an "invisible pool" dive in their last outing, but if things get hairy he'll be back in.
Dolphins (6-6) over Jaguars* (7-5)
I don't "get" either of these teams this season. Then again, all things Florida are somewhat of a mystery to me. Skunk ape, WTF?
Ravens* (6-6) over Lions (2-10)
Charm City has a decent shot at an AFC wild-card slot this year. Motor City has a good shot at its own foot.
Texans* (5-7) over Seahawks (5-7)
I don't wanna talk about it.
Late Sunday Games:
Titans* (5-7) over Rams (1-11)
Tennessee still has a (far) shot at the post-season this year. It ain't gonna happen, but they're gonna play for it.
Raiders* (4-8) over Redskins (3-9)
I've been saying since week 3 that the Raiders would be a decidedly better team without JaMarcus Russell. I've been saying for years that my Skins would be a better team without their owner, coaching staff, and a good chunk of their offense.
Postgame: Well, that just proved my point. The Raiders were looking good until JaMarcus came in and sucked it all up. If I were Al Davis (which, thankfuly, I'm not), I'd shoot that clown out of a cannon ASAP.
Cowboys* (8-4) over Chargers (9-3)
Okay, this is a sucker's bet. I'm not buying into a December Cowboys curse (despite all of the evidence), and still am holding out hope for Denver to win the AFC West (despite all of the evidence to the contrary).
Postgame: Okay, I'm buying it (as is DeMarcus Ware).
Sunday Night Game:
Giants* (7-5) over Eagles (8-4)
Who knows what'll happen in any NFC East divisional match-up? It's fucking nutty. I'm going with the home squadron.
Monday Night Game:
Cardinals (8-4) over 49ers* (5-7)
Dear Niners,
You've repeatedly let me down this season, and I have come to realize that I just can't count on you when it matters. I think we should see other people.
Yours in Christ,
The Liar
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Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team
2 comments:
Lucky.
What I'm wrestling with is whether this reaches up past the coaches. The GM is supposed to keep a train wreck like this from happening, right? Even further, is the GM hamstrung by a penny-pinching President?
I got a sick feeling about Lovie during the superbowl season when he froze his own kicker with a stupid timeout, thereby ending Gould's perfect streak to that point.
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