Fuck, yeah, I'm doin' it again. I really enjoy making these picks every week, and if you have rep riding on it, it makes any game worth watching. I'm in for the year, bitches.
Check back here every Thursday (or Friday, or Saturday, sometimes Wednesday, and maybe even a Tuesday thrown in for sport) for my weekly picks.
2008/2009 Season Record: 168/98/1
2009/2010 Season Record: 0/0
Thursday Night Game:
Steelers* (0-0) over Titans (0-0)
I really would like to pick the Titans in an upset here, but even I know better than to bet against the reigning Super Bowl champs on their home turf.
Early Sunday Games:
Dolphins (0-0) over Falcons* (0-0)
The Fish are going to need every win they can get to make it back to the postseason this year. This is the closest thing to a "must win" game in week one.
Broncos (0-0) over Bengals* (0-0)
Finally, now that Denver dumped Shanahan and that little spoiled bitch of a QB, I can go back to liking them.
Vikings (0-0) over Browns* (0-0)
I would love to see a Browns win here, but the Vikes are looking sharp now that they grave-robbed up a QB that doesn't completely suck.
Colts* (0-0) over Jaguars (0-0)
I want to pick the Jags here, but am playing it safe and sticking with the home team.
Saints* (0-0) over Lions (0-0)
Savor this time, Detroit. You have the best record of your season right now. Good times.
Cowboys (0-0) over Buccaneers* (0-0)
The Cowboys look like a Celestial fire-drill run amok. Fortunately for them, The Bucs are in even greater disarray right now.
Eagles (0-0) over Panthers* (0-0)
ZOMG, it's a wild-cat offense. Rawr!
Ravens* (0-0) over Chiefs (0-0)
Not all 0&0 teams are created equal.
Texans* (0-0) over Jets (0-0)
This one should be a barn-burner, and the only reason I'm picking the Texans is because of their superlative back-up QB, Sexy Rexy (now a Sexen Rexan Texan) Grossman. Bwwwaaaahhh!
Actually, I'm just going with the home team, but that Grossie bit was good for a laugh.
Late Sunday Games:
Giants* (0-0) over Redskins (0-0)
Last season I picked the Redskins to beat the Giants back in week one. Man, sometimes I am such a fucking retard.
Cardinals* (0-0) over 49ers (0-0)
And we're sure that the Arizona Cardinals are the NFC Super Bowl team from last season?
Just checking.
Postgame: I originally had picked San Fran in this one...
Original: "And we're sure that the Arizona Cardinals are the NFC Super Bowl team from last season?
Fuck it, I'm still going with the Niners."
Wish I had stuck with being cute.
Seahawks* (0-0) over Rams (0-0)
Um... Yeah... We're gonna need to go ahead and move this football game downstairs into storage room B. We have some new people coming in, and we need all the space we can get. So if you could just go ahead and pack up your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific, Okay?
Sunday Night Game:
Bears (0-0) over Packers* (0-0)
All of you regular readers of this series know that I fucking HATE Jay Cutler, but I really do think that he makes the Bears a much better team, and am ready to get behind him 100%. Whether or not I punch him in the base of the skull while I'm back there is yet to be determined.
I'm calling 10 or 11 Bears wins this year, which should take Jay up to .500 on his career W/L %.
Postgame: I'm just glad that we finally found a franchise QB that doesn't turn over the ball in critical situations.
Early Monday Night Game:
Patriots* (0-0) over Bills (0-0)
I love me some Buffalo Williams (for some unknown reason), but am not even going to think about making that bet.
Late Monday Night Game:
Chargers (0-0) over Raiders* (0-0)
C'mon, who the fuck hasn't wanted to choke-out Tila Tequilla? Anyone?
Shawne Merriman should take this opportunity and get some solid advice on the art of choking from the Raiders, they are the masters after all.
---
Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team
5 comments:
If ever there was a chance for Rexy to shine, this is it.
Bears.
I like the picks...hate to say the pack may have an edge on Sunday night. It would be a crappy way to begin the Bears' journey into 20th Century offensive football...but I think the Bears D may get exposed against Rogers and the cream cheese crowd. I hope not. I hope the Pack's personel proves all wrong for a Dom Capers style 3-4 D. I'm excited that the picks are back and you are back. I've got to get healthy and get my ass up to the city...soon.
Good start so far - that was a nail-biter.
Okay, I kind of figured we'd split with GB this year. I'm more concerned about it now, but the teams do seem pretty evenly matched. It might come down to crowd noise that makes up the difference.
The other thing that I can't stress enough is that Ron Turner sucks. I said it all last year and the year before. If I know what play is coming next, so does the opposing team.
If Green Bay hadn't made so many dumb mistakes, that game wouldn't have seemed so close. Otherwise they outclassed the Bears in every aspect.
Any team that can throw the ball well should be able to beat the Bears this year. We need to hope other teams' defenses are as porous as ours. I know my man Vasher ain't cutting it anymore, it-a make-a me sad. :-(
Seemed like even our special teams were giving up beaucoup yardage. I don't know if Green Bay's special teams are known to be good, but we didn't look so hot defending against them.
Blocking wasn't too bad and if Forte can keep getting yards it's ultimately going to help DC's buddy find his receivers. I couldn't tell if they weren't running their routes or if Cutler was spazzing but either one at least can be worked on.
Post a Comment