Friday, February 29, 2008

One Last Asscrewing from the Tribune Co

…or On the Considerable Consolation of Getting Drunk as Nero Fiddles

By the way, are there two or three s's when asscrewing is written as one word? Jeanz? Sam Zell? Anybody...?

It was William E. Munny, the professional killer, the name of the man with no name from Clint Eastwood’s Unforgiven who said: “It’s a terrible thing killing a man. You take away all he’s got, and all he’s ever gonna have.”

I keep hearing these nigh-immortal words on mortality as I think of the fuckery that could - I REPEAT COULD befall the cub.

Zell is resolved to sell the park separately. He will first sell the naming rights, which I originally thought was not a big deal…

But you only have to know a little about business and the business of sports (and I fit that description) to know that most of that naming rights money in this case is going to go to the Tribune and Zell’s investors - not the ball club.

Did WhiteSOX ownership benefit from the naming agreement with that stupid phone company? Sure but they were able to channel a shitload of money into the team and the park experience, and believe me - - at that time the SOX park experience needed all the help it could get - - -

In the case of the Trib and its new ownership, they seem to be raiding the assets for the sake of the parent company. Did the cubs get the #1 free agent last year? Right. Did they acquire the top Japanese player this past off-season? Double right. But the seat licensing agreement, the proposed naming rights scenarios, and more importantly separating the team from the park seem to be all bad moves for the cubs in the long run.

And I hope no one reading here is stupid enough to believe that the State of Illinois purchasing and establishing Wrigley as a landmark is going to benefit the ball club. Blaggo’s crew may save Wrigley, help the neighborhood and prevent the beautiful old park from being the Skydome-esque eyesore that some of Zell’s developer buddies would have it become…

…and the purchase of Wrigley by the State of Illinois might even benefit all of us Illinoisans but remember the Bears are separate from Soldier Field and how’s that been working for the team?

The Bears have the advantage of long term ownership and dealing with the Park District Authority or whatever it is for 40 some years or whatever it is and even they have to go hat in hand to the park ownership and do not get the full benefits of the place they fill on Sundays. New cub ownership will be at the mercy of whoever ends up owning the organization’s greatest treasure because to a certain extent, there are people who love the park more than the team. It might not be too extreme to say that for some seasons, the team has needed the park more than the park has needed the team.

I am not sure how to feel about all this.

As a WhiteSOX fan, for years I have taken it from cub fans because you have that park. Part of me wants to say – Selling the field separately from the team gets the cubs one step closer to being the Schaumberg Cubs, y’all gonna love Schaumberg in the summer.

But as a recent convert to the beauty of Wrigley and the cub game experience (remember not cub fan, someone like me cannot switch sides unless the Chairman were to assrape my grandma)…but as someone who now loves and looks forward to going to a few games at that park this summer what looms seems to be the beginning of the end. It is this part of me that is sad.

The part of me that dominates in this internal debate (definitely internal because there is nothing I or all the actual cub fans in the world can do) that is the cynical, resigned but somewhat happy heathen who says ‘Come join me for as many beers as we can get in the shadow of that park this summer. If this is the beginning of some sort of end to one of the coolest places and neighborhoods in the history of summer neighborhoods, let’s slake our thirst with the delicious Pyle as ZellNero (or is it NellZero) burns all that has stood to benefit the Tribune, his Rome, his thing that decent men and women could give a shit for. If this is the way the world works, fine. We can drink our beers and laugh in the sun while it lasts.'

No one can take that from us.

14 comments:

edP said...

And yes I am aware that my best day in Wrigley was in part fascilitated by my dear friend getting Tribune Company tickets. Irony is a bitch ain't it.

Unknown said...

cmon Ed. The time to whine was when they let the Cubs be sold to the Trib in the first place. It's a corporation, corporations are in business to make money. The sweetheart deal with WGN amounted to cheap programming for the super-station. For YEARS they underfunded the team, and no one complained. BUT, god forbid they call it Manilla Folder Stadium at Wrigley Field, THEN everyone gets pissed off.

Zell paid good money for the Trib company, and the Cubs are a huge asset. He has to account for all those back-loaded contracts (Z, Soriano, etc) that are going to hurt the final sale price of the team. He's paying the bill for the checks Hendry has written in the last several years.

He has EVERY right to be a capitalist about this. That's just what comes along with corporate ownership in sports.

Chris B. said...

You know, the evil corporation didn't change it to Tribune Field or WGN Park - they kept it Wrigley.

The name change is significant because the neighborhood is Wrigleyville now. The quaint, historic park amidst the neighborhood bars is a big reason for the sellout crowds. It'd be pretty goofy (and less touristy) to have Manilla Folder Park in the middle of Wrigleyville.

Best case scenario for Cubs fans (in my opinion) would be to re-imagine the property, re-build the stadium on the same spot (not like a spaceship), and get the Wrigley company to buy the naming rights. Problems solved.

edP said...

Khye, no doubt that is exactly why Zell has to and will make all these deals separately. He needs to back up the debt he purchased or however it works...and he has responsibilities to his investors, the company he bought and its future...

And all these things are bigger and probably more important than a baseball team in the long run

I don't think the name change is a big deal either...but the franchise will be gutted, its greatest value will be stripped when the park and the team are two separate entities...

Some SOX fans may celebrate but wen the cubs and their park are separated...that will begin the quest of the new ownership to move the team somewhere else.

All these things are unchangable by you, me or anybody else...I think it marks the beginning of a sad chapter in Chicago baseball history.

edP said...

Chris - I will say this, Tribune ownership has helped make the cubs and wrigleyville what it is. This post wasn't really written from an anti-capitalist point of view - I'll leave that nonsense to know-nothing academics. I am a know-nothing baseball fan...

But I do know this, I'm gonna enjoy that weird little time capsule full f summer fun while it lasts

I may even take the boy

Unknown said...

I would suppose that the Trib didn't change the name of the field because they didn't think it would make them more money (much like the Yankees).

Getting Wrigley to pony up for the rights...I just don't see the sense in it. They'll get more press for NOT ponying up for the rights than if they did. Plus, they don't fit the profile of companies that generally do this kind of thing.

And Ed: Maybe you're right about the Cubs moving. But I think going from taking $400m from a bank for naming rights to moving the team to Arlington Heights is a rather large leap.

Whomever buys the Cubs will probably do it because they LOVE the Cubs, and they'll do what it takes to keep them where they are.

But what the hell do I know, I thought Cuban would own them by now.

DC Liar said...

I'm still holding out hope that Cuban somehow manages to pull off a hostile takeover of the Cubs.
A hostile takeover predominantly featuring a bloody metal folding chair and a cricket bat.

edP said...

DC I want Cuban in too and the best way for him to get in would be to buy the park. Then hold MLB by the friggin balls

Meat Head said...

All this crap about how Zell has a capitalist right to blah blah blah….. What the fuck did Chicago do to attract these douche bag Billionaires. Finally Dollar Bill dies after ruining one of the best of the original six. Thank God being a douche is not genetic.

Really your only defense against his despicable antics is he bought it he can do what ever he wants with it. Technically you are right. There seems to be a lot of rich people who actually care about their respective communities and being a positive force. I am fucking sick and tired of fuck head spouting capitalism and rights of the stockholders. They then go about there business trying to come as close as possible to breaking the law and accumulate there own personnel wealth. These fucking ass clowns share holder value as a smoke screen to rape and pillage and then disappear like smoke. As far as I am concerned half of the shit these fuck head heads pull off is worse than murder and we need to start smoking these bastards.

Zell seems to be a crusty ol potty mouth that wishes he lived in the 1800s before they had worker rights and he could sit on his mounds of gold. He is a real life Mister Burns, and his little Kenny is his gay little Smithers.

That being said, this may be the best thing for me. I am in full-blown Cub happy land; we haven’t played any ball yet. I am can’t stop talking shit about how great we are going to be. I know once the season starts the misery will set in. I said it before….

I can’t stop caring and they can’t stop sucking. This may be the fucking bullet I need to finally get on with my life.

santipissed said...

It's all to complicated. First, Wrigley is under a different a budget line item (real estate) than either the Cubs and WGN (entertainment). This makes it easier for Sammie to sell them off.
As for the naming rights, Mr. F-Bomb Zell has all the right as long as the shareholders agree-the Tribune is not private yet.
Zell is already some $350 million in the hole for his Tribune acquisitiona and holding on to the Cuba and the Stadium are only hurting his wallet. But this guy does not care as he says-If I fail I still have a Billion Dollars and what do you have-no f-ing job!"

If it were up to me I wouyld have all other MLB owners step in-they own the league collectively-and hir an arbitrator to oversee all events outside of the operations of the team. As for Cuban buying the Cubs don't count on it. Reinsdorf tried cockblocking him way back when in the NBA. Reinsdorf has many mor buddies in MLB to block any sell to Cuban.
I work for a company that has a large stake in the operations of Wrigley-over $55 million in annual revenue from that place and the owner of my company is part of a group that is trying to buy all all three together-wgn, wrigley and the cubs and they all know mr. zell.
Maybe the White Sox could buy the naming rights-White Sox Field

DC Liar said...

White Sox Park at Wrigley Field.

I like it. A lot.
That would be like going way retro as a tip to the days before 1900. Back when the Cubs were the White Sox and The White Sox were the Sioux City Cornhuskers.

edP said...

Sioux City is still a fuck of a lot better than the Gary White Sox

MeatHead, your team (barring injuries) will win their division this year

It's my lock of the week, THE CENTURY!

Picture the Adult Swim Carl guy saying that last line.

Meat Head said...

edp,I know my the cubs will win there division. Hell I know they will win the WW. The only problem with that is….
Between my Grandpa(now dead) my Pops and myself, been saying that for a hundred years.

This is our year! It’s got to be! Right?

Meat Head said...

Ha WW! I meant WS. I got the frickin flu and I am delirious. I have not been sick in years and now I have gotten sick twice in the last month.

Is it wrong that is some lunatic actually puts Zell down I would smile? I might burn in hell but I gave a cheer out loud when I found out Dollar Bill passed. May be is some kind of demon that passes from billionaire to billionaire.

Whoa I will lay off the Nyquil now.