Wow, last week was ugly. Every Riot Fest weekend my picks shit the proverbial bed, but I never see it coming. Probably because I'm always legless-drunk, sleep deprived, and half-deaf from all of the fun. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Onto week six...
Last Week's Picks: 8/6
Season Record: 53/23
Early Sunday Games:
Bengals* (4-1) over Texans (2-3)
Hey, I finally picked a Texans game correctly last week! Turns out, the trick was just picking them to lose. The Bengals should win this one (at the very last second, once again).
Packers* (2-2) over Lions (1-4)
Welcome to the bottom half of the NFC North, Fellas. Man, that feels good to say.
Vikings* (5-0) over Ravens (3-2)
I'd really like to see the Ravens pull off a road win here, but Baltimore couldn't corral Cedric Benson last week. Adrian Peterson is gonna have a motherfucking field day
Saints* (4-0) over Giants (5-0)
This is the marque game of week six. Duh. It could easily go either way, but I'm sticking with the home team.
Steelers* (3-2) over Browns (1-4)
I think that Pittsburgh had more of a challenge last week against the Lions. I'm just interested to see whether Derek Anderson completes a pass before Brady Quinn defects to the Steelers sideline.
Panthers (1-3) over Buccaneers* (0-5)
Settle down, Carolina. You just barely pulled off a win against the Skins last week (not a crowning achievement). This week you've gout to buckle down and get your heads straight for this game against Tamp... Uh... Nevermind.
Chiefs (0-5) over Redskins* (2-3)
The Redskins still have not played a team with a win yet this season. Aside from the first game (against the Giants) the combined record of their following 5 opponents has been 2&22. The two wins? Both the Lions and Panthers beat the Skins, and the only two teams that DC has beaten are the Rams and Buccaneers. FUCKING PATHETIC!
Jaguars (2-3) over Rams* (0-5)
The Jags ain't great, but the Rams are baaaaaa...d.
Sorry.
Late Sunday Games:
Seahawks* (2-3) over Cardinals (2-2)
The Shawks fucking decimated the Jaguars last week. It was brutal. Speaking of which, Owen Schmitt's berserker act worked so well last week that this week he's gonna dive into a woodchipper at halftime. Tune in.
Eagles (3-1) over Raiders* (1-4)
Does Tom O still consider himself a Raiders fan? We should all pony up and send that poor son of a bitch a cookie bouquet.
Patriots* (3-2) over Titans (0-5)
Yeah, The Titans really need a win and are dead in the water if they can't pull off a miracle in Foxborough. Too bad for them, it looks like Brady is just starting to get re-settled in his role.
Jets* (3-2) over Bills (1-4)
Goddamned Jets! I can't believe you lost to the fucking Fish last week. If you weren't playing the Williams this week, I'd so bet against you for that mess.
Sunday Night Game:
Bears (3-1) over Falcons* (3-1)
No whammies, no whammies, no whammies, no whammies!
This one's a leap of faith. I really want to believe that the Bears are for real this year, but am still gun-shy from the Grossie era. I think that Chicago can pull this off, but then again, I thought that the 49ers could do the same last week.
Monday Night Game:
Broncos (5-0) over Chargers* (2-2)
Everybody and their retarded third-cousin are picking the Bolts to upset (so much so, that the open betting line has Denver at -4). San Diego really needs this win, but I just don't see Denver rolling over for their most reviled divisional opponent. If someone is offering you Denver plus 3.5 points, make that bet.
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Wrong Picks in RED
Correct Picks in GREEN
*Indicates Home Team
2 comments:
i dropped the raiders last year after i went to the opening monday night game. they got destroyed by denver and the entire section next to us erupted into a fight - raiders fans vs. raiders fans. just a bad scene all around. then, singletary takes over so i jumped on the niners bandwagon! i love not really being from here!
Good Call, Mr. Tom.
Now if only I could shake my affinity for the Redskins...
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